Stop pulling away. Find your joy again.
Clients I work with had trouble feeling present with their partners, too. They felt distance growing between them, as if they were roommates. It felt easier to flirt back with the old flame who comments on all their pictures than to look at why they feel disconnected. Maybe they’ve already made the jump to infidelity - either emotionally or physically - and don’t know what to do with the guilt, shame, and anger they’re feeling. The distance they felt from their partners caused them to retreat inside themselves.
They are terrified of being alone and equally afraid of conflict. They find themselves involved in arguments without knowing how they got there. They just give in and not participate in their partnership - say yes or just take the blame or agree because the prospect of sharing their true feelings might lead to a confrontation. Dodging their feelings causes them to feel stuck in their relationships, professional lives, and creative pursuits.
My clients tried everything the internet has told them to do: gratitude journaling, affirmations, self-care, coping skills. But they felt the disconnect between what they felt inside and the uplifting messages on post-its all over the place. Something continued to interfere with their ability to connect with their partners.
Before they came to see me, my clients' relationships alternated between blah and volatile with very little in between. While succeeding in so many areas of their lives, they were unsure how to access the fuller spectrum of emotions within. Being vulnerable caused them anxiety and left them feeling too exposed.
An emotionally rich life is attainable for you, too. Experiencing a wider range of feelings enhances connections with others, inspires creative expression, and cultivates a better balance between your family and career. If you want to discover new ways of experiencing your life, I’d love to help you.
For some, couples counseling is typically the go-to for problems in relationships. While it has tremendous value, I prefer to work individually with one partner to help you make meaning of how you show up in your relationship.
My physical office is located in Livingston, New Jersey, but I see clients online throughout the state of New Jersey. If over time you’re interested in a referral for couples counseling, I can provide a referral to a trusted colleague. Please email me at email@example.com if you’d like a free 15-minute phone consultation.